(Ken's steak was burned)
Ken: I think this cow must have died in a fire.

(a conversation about where to eat dinner)
Hurl: Let's go get steak. I know a place where you can get a 72 ounce steak.
Ken: Hurl...I'm trying NOT to spend a lot of money.
Hurl: If you eat it all...it's free!

Miles: I think you, me, and Sid have the same taste buds...as far as eating stuff.

(Jeremy's generous reply to Kenneth in a conversation about what we would do if we had a lot of money, Ken said he would buy a nice guitar)
Jer: Man, shut up. I'd buy you a bowl and a crappy guitar, and you could cry in the bowl.

(Jeremy talking about taking pictures of his penis again)
Jer: I'd like to turn the air conditioning way up, so it was really cold, then take a picture of my wang and put it on here (signature on a BB). Cos I don't think anyone took a picture of a shriveled dong.

(redundant professors!)
My English Teacher: What's interesting is, there's an interesting parallel.

(after we saw Courtney Love on VH1's Sexiest Artist list)
Me: Courtney Love? She's like...anti-sexy.
Ken: Yea...she makes me want to hide my wang.

(talking about leaving nude picture of yourself on someone's computer)
Jer: If I took a picture of my dong, I'd be sure to get hard and poke the camera so you couldn't tell what it was.

Ken: G.I. Joes were cool. They were the best toys because everything shot or hit something or bothered someone.

(worrying about Jer's after-prom party)
Mom: You need to change clothes. What are you planning on doing anyway?
Jer: I was just gonna stay in the pool all night.
Mom: What pool? You mean like a swimming pool?
Jer: Well, I guess I could have been talking about a cesspool...

(during a conversation about whether burning the flag should be legal)
Ken: What the fuck do I care, I have a nuke. I'll burn all your flags with one button.

(during a game of Scrabble)
Allen: What are you doing, Lee? That's not a word.
Lee: Yes it is. H-A-R-P. Harp.
Allen: That says "H-R-A-P."

Evan: What's the matter, Lee? You don't like getting your muffler cleaned?"

(while Will is telling a stupid story about roller coasters)
Evan: Anyone want to go to McDonald's?
Brett: They're closed.
Evan: I know, but anything's better than being here.

(trying once and for all to prove his heterosexuality - he was pretty mad at the time)
Lee: I...like...MEN.

Lee: I need to get my butt-fucking brain straight.

(pondering whether he's qualified to work at Vito's)
Miles: I can toss salad.

(Hooman used to own Vito's...he always picked on Lee)
Hooman: You can go get your drink.
Lee: I would like a Sprite with no ice.
Hooman: Carry your ass over there...and get your drink.

(and again...)
Hooman: Lee wrestles? Damn! He must be heavyweight!

(after finding out that Ken wrote in a price on the menu, in pen)
Hooman: You mess up my menus again, you're going back to McDonald's.

(during a Mage game Evan was running)
Evan: Noe, you have to roll stamina. You're ten stories up and dizzy from vertigo.
Noe: But my demeanor is rebel. Isn't that really rebelling against gravity?
Evan: Rebels aren't lemmings, Noe.

Ken: Opening bands are just supposed to get you in the mood. It's like foreplay, only for music.

(Noe has always had problems talking straight)
Noe: Can you imagine how suck that much it would?

(I get a nice compliment during a Mage game)
Jen: It may have been a total fuckup, but you gotta give me an A for style.
Phil: Yea, I'll give you that. I've known some VA's, but you do the most sneaky, underhanded, stick in the ass things I've ever seen.


.:: Virtual Mindscape ::.