X-Fest 2000
26 May 2000

Eight bands participated in X-fest. In order of their performance, they were The Hippos, Dynamite Hack, 8stops7, Reel Big Fish, MXPX, the Bloodhound Gang, Cypress Hill, and ICP. I went with Kenjicus and Hurl.

The concert started at 4, sorta weird for a Friday, at least I think so. We were okay though. Hurl had a note from his dad that he had to cut the grass at 12:30. I get out at 12:30 anyway. Ken got out in his own "special" way. We left at about 2:30, then had to turn around cos Hurl forgot his ticket. The rest of the ride was smooth. That van kicked ass. The seats reclined, and there were pillows.

They didn't open the amphitheater until 4:00. The result was a long ass line stretching all the way across the parking lot. I saw at least 100 people with ICP face paint on. I thought it was pretty cool. After baking for half an hour or so, we finally made it into the ampitheater. We looked around and didn't see anything interesting, so we went in and had a hell of a time snagging some seats. The Hippos were on the side stage, but we decided to hang out and wait for Dynamite Hack to come on the main stage. We sat there for awhile, and the guy behind us was talking about how he'd like to beat some ICP fans' asses, and that it "didn't matter if they were a bunch of kids, as long as they're old enough to bleed." Inspired, Ken and Hurl left me to guard our seats. They were gone for 10 or 15 minutes, then came back, each wearing an ICP shirt. Ken gave me the one he bought to wear.

Ken and I left Hurl with the seats, and went down to get something to drink. All this would have gone well, had there not been a sacing circle on the way there. Even though I kinda wanted to see 8stops7, Ken wanted to stop and show off. Eventually we were joined by Hurl. We hung out there all through 8stops7. Then Reel Big Fish came on the main stage, but no one cared. So we saced through them too. Sometime during Reel Big Fish, we met up with Ken's cousin George. Ken went and retrieved his shirt that was marking our seats, and we went up on the lawn with George. We hung out there for awhile, then Ken spotted another sacing circle higher on the lawn, so we went to "investigate." We "investigated" all through MXPX, on the lower stage.

After MXPX went off, we tried to find Hurl or George, but couldn't find either. So, we went back into the seating area and found a couple of seats towards the back that were in a relatively empty area. We watched the Bloodhound Gang from there, sprawled across a couple of seats, with our feet up. They played most of their popular songs. After the first or second song, they offered some guy $100 to drink a six-pack of warm Coke. I'm not sure if he did it, but I don't think so. Between acts, one of the guys held up pictures of rainbows and Teletubbies and said, "I'm Justin from N'SYNC." Immediately afterwards, they played I Wish I Were Queer So I Could Get Chicks. Also between acts, they asked this guy if he could put a funnel down his pants and roll a quarter down his nose into it with his eyes closed, and offered him money and a shirt. While his eyes were closed they poured half a gallon of milk down the funnel. For his pains, they gave him 75 cents and a shirt that didn't fit him. They closed with Bad Touch, which opened with that song No Scrubs by TLC, and in the middle they pulled out this trunk that said "N'SYNC" and put on khakis, black shirts, and red hats and started doing the dance from the video.

By the time Cypress Hill got on, it was getting dark. Hurl, Ken, and I went down to the orchestra pit and hung around until we were told to get out of the aisle. Hurl tried to give the guy $10 to let him in, but it didn't work. He went off somewhere, and me and Ken found seats about where we were for Dynamite Hack, about 23 or 24 rows back. Not that they were there for any reason. We stood up almost the entire time. I'm not gonna list any songs they played, cos honestly I don't know Cypress Hill that well at all. I know they must have been hot, though. They were jumping all over the place. They closed with Rock Superstar.

In all honesty, ICP was the band I came to see. I sorta like Dynamite Hack, 8stops7. I like the Bloodhound Gang. And what I've heard of Cypress Hill (not much, but more than just Rock Superstar) I like. But I really like ICP. So, when they dimmed the lights 15 or 20 minutes after Cypress Hill went off and started asking who liked ICP, I was ready. It was another 15 minutes before they came on, though, so I was sorta pissed.

The stage was littered with alien-ish props. People walked around in alien suits. Then J and Shaggy came out, to the remix of Chicken Huntin' that they play on the radio. Everyone was into it. They played sort of a medley after that, the remix of Hokus Pokus, into Bring it On, and this other song I didn't recognize. The whole time they were spraying Faygo into the crowd and throwing and kicking half-full bottles of it. After that set, they told everyone to come into the pit, jumping the security guards if necessary. People started moving down, even though it was obvious not all were gonna get in. They turned the lights back on to make the guards' job easier. Then me and Ken got our stuff and skipped up through the abandoned seats. We got all the way up to the fourth row. They played Fuck the World, Play With Me, Halls of Illusions, Everyody Rize, I Want my Shit, and Another Love Song (probably not in that order). I was on my feet the whole time, and in the air a lot of it. During Another Love Song, Shaggy was sounding off-key, and J told him so. Then in the part where he's supposed to say "then I'm going to kill you," he said, "suck my dick you faggot." They closed with Assassins, and let a whole bunch of people up on the stage. They helped in the Faygo distribution, even though I didn't get any.

The concert was over at 11. We had about an hour to hang around outside the gates, since a severly misinformed security guard told me it was over at midnight.

We were sitting there in front of the gate with about 30 other people, when this police officer rode up to us. He demanded to know which of us had the laser pointer. We told him we didn't know what he was talking about. He told us it was bullshit (direct quote) and stood there waiting for something. Hurl emptied his pockets and the guy poked through it with a flashlight, while Ken and I watched him. He looked pissed, but he said, "if I catch one of y'all with it, you know it's illegal" and rode off.

Later this guy came up to us, advertising his group of bands "living on a communal farm, who were about the music, fuck the coporations." He handed us a sticker. Then we were informed that the sticker was a dollar. Magazines were $2. A CD was $10. Hurl bought a tape and a sticker for $4. Later, while we were milling around in the parking lot, Ken found a CD next to the road, unopened. He later informed me that the CD sucked.

On the way home, I vaguely remember Hurl pointing out to my dad what the race of each driver that passed us was, based on the car and the driving. He was doing pretty good. We got home at 1 or 1:30, I wrote a sketchy post about the concert on the message board, took a shower to get the alcohol out of my hair that ended up there during Cypress Hill, and went to bed.